Misty F Fiction

002 – The Best Gag

This text is updated to some extent from the Tumblr version. If you have feedback about this story, send me an ask. This story is rated PSFW for Dubious Consent, Exaggerated Growth, Exhibitionism, Ignorant of Participation, Implied Sex, Non-Sexual Nudity and Significant Sexually-Focused Transformation

Oscar was positively overwhelmed by the number of people on the convention floor. He had been told by his friends the dealers' room would be packed but it had been hard to grasp just how dense the crowd would be until he was there. After nearly twenty minutes of being dragged along by the flow of the room, the nerd climbed out of the press of people and tried to catch his breath in the back corner of the room.

“Greetings! See anything you’re interested in?”

The lady working the booth he found himself standing next to was smiling at him. She was cute, with dark, frizzy hair that framed her over-sized spectacles. Through the glare on the lenses, her eyes seemed to be glowing. She was wearing a shirt much too big for her with a seven-pointed star inscribed within a circle. A pair of faerie wings hung loosely off her shoulders by two straps. The stall behind her was filled with knick-knacks from the last two seasons of anime, shirts with all kinds of artwork, a smattering of American superhero comics from the last few months, and a number of nondescript paper bags.

“I… I’m just looking, thanks.”

“Oh. Okay. Well, if you see anything…”

Oscar went to thank her but she was already conversing with another couple standing near the other corner. She didn’t waste any time sinking her fangs into another pair of potential customers. Though, now that she wasn’t standing over him, he could actually take stock of what she had. Apparently, the bags contained a collection of random things worth about what their asking price was…perhaps even more. He was feeling lucky despite feeling trapped so he flagged the clerk down.

“Did you find something?”

“Yeah, can I get one of those bags?” He asked offering a couple of bills.

“Oh, the grab bag?” She winked as she turned back around and handed him one. “Hoping to court fortune are we?”

“Oh, um,” he blushed and stammered. “No, nothing like that. Just so overwhelmed.”

“I'm sure. First time?”

“Yeah. I've never done anything like this.”

“Ah, cool. Well, what'd you get, then? I might give you another bag if that one's terrible.”

It turned out the bag contained a shirt for a show he liked, though it was a couple of sizes too big. It also had a couple volumes of a manga he had been meaning to pick up. Slipped between them was a card with some symbols written on it.

“Miss, what does this mean?”

She squinted at the card and then laughed. “It’s supposed to be a charm for masculine power or something like that, but the characters aren’t exactly correct. Heck, for all I know, it might even say it’ll grow your dick and balls or blow you up into Conan. We got a few as part of some promotion for some fighting game I never heard of but, all of the characters look like they stepped right out of JBA.”

Grow his dick? In spite of himself, Oscar was intrigued. He had always felt like he was on the small side. If this really did something so ridiculous, that might not be so bad. “How's it supposed to work?”

She put her hand out and he passed her the card. The clerk flipped it over in her hands as if reading the tiny print on the back. “It says it has a keyword that activates it, though doesn’t say what. So I imagine if someone says the word near you while you’re holding it then it’s effect will happen.” The woman passed the card back. “It’s just a gag, really. Might be worth something in a year if the game takes off.”

Oscar tucked the card into his pocket and thanked her for the answers before heading back into the crowd. As he tried to make it back to the main area, however, he started to feel pricks of heat against his crotch. He figured it was his phone and ignored it. Only, the spikes grew more frequent. Slowly, he began to associate the spikes with a few words he kept hearing in the sea of people. Was it the card reacting to its keyword? Which was it? 'Fire' had seemed common. As had leather. Was it more a phallic word, like 'cucumber' or something?

He stumbled into a side room which was mercifully empty. Oscar tried a few words to no avail, and yet, his pants did feel tighter. Desperate to know what was going on, he made a bee-line for the bathroom. The spikes of heat returned as he swam through the sea of people, growing more frequent and more insistent. By the time he got to a stall, it felt like someone had a warm massager against his thigh.

Pulling his pants down, considerably more penis than before sprang up to tent his underwear. Oscar tentatively gripped the throbbing shaft through the fabric and confirmed it was not some illusion. He could feel it continue to become more and more super-human against his hand as veins snaked and split and thickened. His heart began to race, and it only hastened the growth. Each beat of his heart made him gasp as the strength of his pumping blood starting to work his erection. He hurriedly stuffed his now gigantic cock back into his pants and decided to go back to the booth he got the card at to tell the clerk the talisman's effect was real.

“Guess it wasn’t a gag…”

Back in the press of people the heat returned. As he strode up the aisles he could feel his clothes as a whole getting tighter. It felt like each step went just a little further. Each swing of his arms strained the sleeves and shoulders of his shirt. All the while, his dick was slowly snaking further along his thigh. A quick glance down confirmed his erection was visible now through his pants and getting steadily more so as he filled out all over. Forget telling the clerk the card worked, he had to get out of the hall and back to his room before he ended up naked in front of all these people!

However, moving with any haste was growing difficult as his balls began to catch up with his shaft and his muscles started growing in earnest. In a matter of seconds, his biceps had swollen to a size that his upper arms looked like he was always flexing, and he could not believe his thick, Popeyesque forearms were attached to him. The effect had not missed leg day either, and his now well-defined quads had pulled his jeans so tight they looked more like Spandex than denim. Squished together and forward by his ham-like thigh muscles, the soft skin of his sack teased just under half of his near-knee length dick. Just that vague stimulation was enough to push him towards the edge. The feeling of pleasure building until he was sure he would explode inside his pants. A quick glance down confirmed that drops of pre-cum were already seeping through the thick fabric but, the elevator was only feet away.

The bell rang just as the sound of tearing seams reached his ears. He pushed the button for his floor and the doors closed just as he felt his dick swing free from his ruined inseam, leading the way for balls that, from their hefty weight, had to have grown four times their size! In the silence, the heat dissipated though his arm-sized erection did not. If anything, the cool air of the elevator was coaxing him to even greater heights of arousal. He thought about gripping that meat and jerking until he emptied his new balls. He let out a sigh and turned to wait for the seven floors to pass, only to realize he wasn’t the only one in the elevator. Standing there, watching him with a wide grin, was the woman from the booth--or at least she was wearing the same clothes. He could not recall if her lips had been that full. Had her shirt been so low cut before? Had she always had that much cleavage? Those pixie wings seemed awfully real for a costume accessory. Was she…was she floating?

“Fancy meeting you here,” she said, openly drinking in his cock and body. The grin on her face said she was enjoying what she was seeing. “It would seem that talisman worked, huh?”

"I thought you said it was a gag--" he began.

“Oh it was absolutely a gag," she said over him. "My favorite one in fact.” She grinned mischievously as he groaned in response to a throbbing growth spurt that pulled him off balance.

His cock was even bigger now, its near two-liter girth sporting thick, pulsing veins. "T-t-this is absurd! I can't--How do I fix this?"

“Not sure why you'd want me to," she said with a throaty purr. "But, I can undo it--for a fee.”

He suddenly surged larger and gained both a foot of height and width, destroying what remained of his clothes. Only his underwear was holding on and they would like not survive another growth spurt. "I'll do anything!"

“Oh, I’m sure you will. Work me hard tonight, and I'll consider your debt paid. Sound good?”

The elevator dinged, they were on his floor. She tossed him the shirt from the bag and offered a hand. He pulled the shirt on, noting that it fit perfectly, and led her to his room. "What was the keyword?" he asked.

“Gag, obviously," she said, fluttering inside as his body began to throb again. "Now, why don't you show me the other meaning of that word?"

Maybe it was just the moment, maybe it was the talisman, or maybe it was all the extra testosterone in his system but, whatever the reason, that phrase made him hornier than ever before, and he was anticipating finding out just how much of a stud he had become...

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